Three non-obvious causes of children’s hysterics (and how to deal with them)
Children’s hysteria – not always a sign of spoil, whims or bad education. Together with the expert, we deal with the causes of this behavior and how to react correctly.
For the most common hysteria, poor health of the child may be hidden, intense, discomfort. Children (unlike adults) can not always determine their state and say that they are worried, and here the nervous system comes to the rescue, which in its own way about the problem. Together with the psychologist Adexandre Harris, we study the most common and non-obvious causes of children’s hysteria.
Failure to follow the day of the day
Do not forget until the child is small, the day mode must be strictly observed. Rested, full and satisfied child is much less frustrated and does not check the parents for strength, besides, the established routine of the day helps children to grow harmoniously and develop and beneficially affects health.
Try to install the frames – a daily child goes to sleep at the same time, feeds in accordance with the day mode, and the amount of time for computer games and other online entertainment is limited.
Another reason for the fact that the child often suits hysterics can be in the reaction of the baby to the surrounding reality. If it seems to you that the child often hysteriate without visible reasons, it is necessary to consult from a children’s neurologist and a psychologist – perhaps the problem is not so much in the child, but in you themselves – an increased anxiety and various kinds of neurosis may affect the psycho-emotional state of children, and Therefore, it is not worth excluding this factor from the list of possible reasons.
Self expression and manipulation
Of course, to upset can and quite healthy, sleeping and satisfied with the child. And the reason to declare you about your rights can also be quite informed from his point of view – so your baby is trying to convey to you that he is an independent unit with his needs and desires that, in his opinion, you are trying to ignore every way. In other words – so the child requires your attention, asks to give something or buy what he likes.
Introduce shopping and other hysterics from the category "Give – I want", of course, it is not necessary, otherwise the hysterics will become a great way for a child to achieve its goals and will turn into a manipulation method by adults. Such hysteries are not only a bill of rights, but also checking parents for strength: "Will you give me what I want, or put in place". That is why it is so important to bring up a child and be consistent in their decisions.
What to do?
Many parents have first forbid something, and then give up after the flow of tears. Naturally, the child remembers this mechanism that allows him to get the desired and, not embarrassed, uses it in the future. Be consistent in your actions and words: the child needs the borders of the permissible, so its world becomes understandable and safe. If he behaves bad, does not listen, it is not worth playing in the "bad and good policeman" when mom does not scold and regrets, and dad is trying to fit. For the psyche of any child, it is important that parents oppose the united front – then the child will have less reasons to have (Read also: Main mistakes of modern parents).
Do not argue and do not try to explain to the baby who already beats in hysterics – do it wise. Your task is to switch the child’s attention to something as soon as possible. Show patience, resistance and self-control, when the process has already started. If the child is upset because of your reasonable failure to buy something or do, let him survive negative emotions and this situation so that he makes it the right conclusion, and always explain to my refusal. The main thing is when you say no, it should not look like a desire to dismiss – learn to negotiate with your child: if something really liked him, and he really wants to get this thing, and you for some reason, for example, financial , not ready or you think that now this purchase is not to the place, then so tell me about it – offer to wait, buy this thing as a birthday present, if the baby does not change his mind.